Seriously. Let’s start at the very beginning (it’s a very good place to start)…..
We left out bedroom door open last night to let the air circulate. When we do this, my cat can come in to our room at 4 am and wake me up. She does this by being all sweet and nuzzling my face, neck and arms, and then, when I’m ALMOST awake, she turns around and sits on my face. (Yes, I just said that.) (My animals have a thing about sitting on people’s or each other’s heads.) So, I’m awake but my increasingly lazy dog is not. This morning, he was SOOOO Lazy that I had to carry him almost everywhere (outside, to his food dish, back upstairs to the bathroom while I shower so he doesn’t poop in the kitchen….. everywhere, that is, except for the cat’s food dish. He just can’t get enough of the cat food. Ugh.). So I get downstairs to make my coffee (thank the gods for caffeine) and promptly spill 99% of the bag on the floor (after my lazy dog bumps into me while running to the cat food dish.) I sweep that up and then go to take a shower. In the bathroom, I’m bumping things over (my hair dryer. Almost broke that one) and dropping things (the shampoo AND conditioner containers to name a couple) and trying not to scream at the top of my lungs at 6 am.
So I get to work to find out that my co-worker had her baby. VERY exciting news, except now I have to listen to people ooh and aaaah and talk about babies ALL day! The girl hiding in her cube and being antisocial unless spoken to directly? That’s me. Later, one of my vendors comes in with the new person in charge of our account to meet me. While I was reaching up into my cabinet to get out some more business cards, out falls my bowl (I keep a mini pantry at work) and it knocks over my coffee cup that is SUPPOSED to be spill proof. It’s not. I then had to hurry up and clean up my HUGE coffee mess before I could even think about talking to this new girl. Great first impression, huh?
The rest of the day is more or less uneventful until just a few minutes ago (4pm-one hour left in the work day) when my phone started ringing off the hook Most were questions that I had to make up answers to since I’m covering for the girl who’s out on leave (while explaining every little detail I know about her labor and resulting morsel of adorableness) until the last one. The last phone call I received in this plethora of calls goes something like this:
Me: Thank you for calling _______ purchasing. This is Jill.
Caller (recording): (something along the lines of) How important are your children to you? Do you have them covered in case of medical emergency? Children are the greatest thing in the world. Isn’t being a parent one of the greatest joys of life? Don’t you want to cherish every minute you have with them and keep them healthy…….
Me: Ummm is this a joke? (SLAM)
I wouldn't be surprised if I got home to find some baby related coupons/adds in my mailbox. Those always seem to come on the worst possible days……